Normally my obsessive thoughts or curious predicaments or Josieisms or my attempts to analyze my choices inspire me to type a post but today my mind is blank. I'm still recovering from a long weekend in Houston to attend my cousin's wedding & to see Josie debut as a flower girl. Perhaps there's a post I can carve from the lessons learned this weekend.
When you're looking forward to an event for over six months, there are bound to be some disappointments along with extreme anxiety. Josie's been talking non-stop about being a flower girl & started counting the sleeps somewhere around 70 Sleeps to Go. We've been taking care of little tasks for the past month to make sure her Costume was ready: fitting at the seamstress to make alterations to the beautiful flower girl dress, a scary trip downtown to Sunnyside Department Store to find ballet slippers, a thorough search for the perfect Flower Girl Up-Do hairstyle, shopping for hair clips to accent the Up-Do, finding plastic jewelry that would be appropriate to wear to a fancy wedding, selecting bling for the reception flip flops, finding an acceptable Rehearsal Dinner outfit, packing our gear to minimize our checked baggage fee, writing sub plans since school days would be missed, struggling through the final 4 sleeps when Josie could hardly contain her excitement and couldn't fall asleep & the final push to the airport. Let me tell you...life is much simpler when I travel alone. (But also less entertaining, I suppose.)
The wedding turned out to be beautiful but the pictures I took did not turn out well, probably due to my shaking hands & my bloodshot tired eyes. Bummer. I think I started snapping photos just to keep my hands off of Josie & my mind focused on something other than her constant whine. Actually, I think some of those whiny moments were somewhat Tantrumish and humiliating. Very humilitating. But, as Diane pointed out on Monday...these will be stories to laugh about someday. Maybe I'll read this a few weeks or months from now & laugh instead of cringe.
Scared Flower Girl Faces as they listened to strict instructions from Sissy, The Wedding Planner from Hell
My lame attempt at styling Josie's hair since she refused to go to her Hair Dresser's Appointment. Anyone who knows me, knows that Hair Styling is a serious Deficit in my Book of Talents.
In retrospect, I know that a fancy Catholic church wedding ceremony in the middle of a downtown city after an 8 hour day of traveling into a different time zone was NOT a good idea for a six year old during a short "long weekend". Josie's extremely social and loves people but her sleep deprivation & disappointment upon finding out that her cousins couldn't join us pushed her over the edge of sanity. I was right there with her & felt like I simply followed her from crisis to crisis all weekend. I was exhausted from all of the diverting & cajoling. I think it was one of my most humiliating experiences as a parent. (Other than that 'pottying in the grass' episode at David & Gudrun's house last year, that is. Although, this is a close 2nd place.)
My sister called yesterday to hear about all of the wedding events & after sharing my stories from my perspective I suggested that she call someone who was there without a 6 year old to find out The Truth. Our $24 small cheese pizza eaten on the sidewalk outside the Magnolia Hotel at 8 O'clock at night because a tantrum forced us to miss the Rehearsal Dinner at the Alley Theater was NOT the highlight of the weekend. I was thinking we'd eat that pizza in our hotel room while watching Monsters Vs Aliens but the buzzing fire alarm that forced an evacuation of the hotel & the booming sirens from the fire engines echoing off of the other skyscrapers just made my head spin & my hands started digging for the Excedrin that was safely tucked into my purse.
Our Friday Night Pizza Entertainment outside the Magnolia Hotel in Houston. My ears are still ringing.
We had looked forward to swimming in the rooftop pool & relaxing in the hot tub but one was too cold & the other scorched our feet so that all we could do was enjoy the blustery wind at 26 stories high. Bribing Josie to walk down the aisle at the wedding turned out okay...she actually completed what she seemed to think was a Death March but only after I promised she could wear her jeans & Old Navy Cupcakes Rock T-shirt to the reception. By then, I was Over It.
Scowling as she waits for dinner to be served at the Reception in her Reward Outfit.
After the too-numerous-to-count tantrums, she ended up dancing the night away at the Reception. Don't you love the outfit? Wonder how many people were saying, "Can't her mother control that girl?"
I had all day Sunday, on our travel day back to Fresno, to determine that I did everything I swore I'd never do as a Parent. I folded under pressure & I'll be spending weeks building back my confidence as a parent. I truly hope that Josie isn't traumatized by my threats & scowls & cursings that were uttered throughout the weekend. The final straw was losing our Boarding Passes in the restroom moments before our scheduled flight. Luckily, Josie's comment brought me back from the edge of insanity when she asked, "Does this mean we'll be living here in this airport for the rest of our lives, Mommy? I hope they have apple juice."
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