Gratitude

Each night when I put Josie to bed we have our little rituals that both of us seem to need in order to settle in for the night. Her bath is followed by a snack, a chance to watch one more 'movie', one more drink of apple juice, brushing teeth, and then it's time to climb in bed. Most nights she picks out two books for me to read to her and then the lights go out. We snuggle in bed together and I repeat the lines that my grandmother said to me on my many sleepovers,

"Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite."

Josie repeats that phrase and adds,

"I won't wiggle, I won't move and I won't get out of bed, Mommy."

Then I respond with, "And even if you do, I'll love you anyway."

After those formalities are finished we talk about the things we are Grateful for about our day. I've done this with Josie since before she could talk and I remember vividly the days when she'd simply stare at me and smile or babble like she was adding her own ideas to my list. Now that she loves to chatter on and on, her own list of Grateful Things is usually very long and very thoughtful. She never lets me skip this part of the bedtime routine.

"I liked playing fairies with Maya & Sage."

"I think it's funny when Michele calls me silly names."

"Holding Nikki's kitty was the best part of my day, Momma."

"My Grandma is so nice to send me boxes of special things."

"I like reading books with Marilyn."

"Mrs. Rodgers knows the best songs and I LOVE the Crazy Color Creatures!"

'I'm glad my Daddy ate dinner with us tonight."

"I love helping my Grandpa work. He loves me, you know."

Most nights I have to cut off her long list but I love listening to her as she remembers the best part of her day. I think it helps her sequence the day and it definitely increases her ability to tell a story. Since we aren't members of an organized church the Grateful List has become our nightly prayers, which was part of my childhood routine since I was raised Catholic.

Gratitude is something that I want Josie to recognize every day. We are so lucky to live in a world where we have choices, where we can research candidates and cast a vote, where we have ample resources of food, where we have decent (although expensive) healthcare, and where we can feel safe in our communities. There's always room for negative thoughts and a negative perspective but I want to teach Josie to look at the wonderful parts of our day and our lives. She's such a happy child and I want her to continue on that path.

I have had so many people to be grateful for over the past few years. People who have helped me when I've been ill, people who have made themselves our family since our extended family lives thousands of miles away, people who have given me words of encouragment just when I needed it, people who let me vent/moan/complain when I need to, and generous friends who have given me furniture and helped me financially (or made offers of help that I was too proud to accept). I am so fortunate to have the people that I've needed in my life.

This is my attempt at making a public posting to honor those people on my Grateful List. I know that your kindness has been heartfelt and there is no way for me to truly convey my appreciation. I feel like so many have been "Paying It Forward" to make my life easier.

"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. "

~Thornton Wilder

Thank you all. I need you and appreciate you more than you know.